September Blog 2020
Happy spring to all of us in the southern hemisphere, and to those in the northern hemisphere enjoy the fall. Where all of the leaves on the trees filled with colours expressing the moving on in prep for winter, as we enjoy the fresh blooms of entering in prep for summer!
This time has been huge over the past few months and it has certainly highlighted the state of loneliness amongst other…
It is interesting the state of loneliness and what it means for each of us.
Thinking about it, do any feelings arise? Where do those feelings sit in your body? Is there an accompanying story that goes way back in your time line on top of the story that’s triggering the feeling? Or maybe there is a disconnection going on, where feelings related have been discarded and placed on the too hard pile?
What I’ve noticed over the years is this can certainly occur when you are alone but also when you are around others. Especially when you are going through change, (which we are theoretically, every day) moving on from people or situations that no longer suit or that you align with.
And that has been also highlighted this year, moving on from those that we don’t feel connected with any more. For some that means moving on in a relationship or moving from a work situation that you realise you cannot tolerate any longer, or friendships that were draining and toxic. There are many situations that could be listed here. And the guilt that can be felt from making a choice that you know is going to support your wellbeing can be significant if you allow it. Making a choice and sticking with it is 100% your responsibility.
It has been a good year to step up and move on and honour our path despite the possibility where the initial aspects may well have been painful, even if the choice felt simple.
But how long had you been sitting in that pain? It takes great courage to honour ourselves, and put faith in life where the bigger picture has your back and that somehow you will, as you step forward, do well.
What if we were to welcome loneliness rather than see it as an impasse?
If we were to see it and feel it as an opportunity to slow down, or to open up to some clearing of emotions. This is learning, to see a situation in a different manner! That our inner self is drawing, emotionally, to our attention, something that needs addressing or simply to notice and feel. To notice and feel means your body is talking to you, are you listening?
What has been going on in your life that aches and pains have turned up, they are related.
What if you were to stay with it, that you honour what you are feeling, take it, that is a time to go within and do some ‘being with yourself’. To be still and listen and feel. Which initially we avoid at all cost. It’s what we’ve been taught that in turn keeps us in the victim cycle. Rather, see it as a rite of passage, the opportunity to transform.
Life falls into place after rough passages as well as great and beautiful times, it’s the trusting in the ‘I don’t know’ is what stands out. Keeping out of old stories where possible and being truly here right now helps get things in perspective. We got this ok, this time too shall pass.
And if you feel you require therapy to help then that’s what you do we all require it, no one gets off “Scott free’ from pain and suffering. As those old stories have a place to be told, and got through and moved on from, to be put to bed.
Leaving old worn out beliefs can come with shedding tears and feeling very uncomfortable, it will change, you will be ok. If you are conscious of your inner and outer world, getting to really know yourself you can ride the waves of life with oomf and care while enjoying the crest and riding down into the depths.
Talk kindly to yourself when toxic thinking steps in, instead of berating and make yourself wrong. The majority of time what you are thinking isn’t true.
So please be gentle and kind as we traverse this paradigm shift.
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Blessings and Grace